I just sat through the President's address. I don't think I can say that I have ever before been so intent upon the words of a political figure. I know that the event of Sept. 11th may come to be thought of among the most profound of our age. I know that it has changed forever the way we look upon our world. I was surprised however, by the power that the leader of my Nation had upon me with his words...

There were times when his statements drew those listening to their feet with thunderous applause. Among all the things he said, when he spoke of our resolution against this threat to not only ourselves but to freedom itself, I was moved. When he said "We will not falter. We will not fail", all I could think of was that is my President. By the Gods, I may not have voted for him, but from this moment forth he is mine.

It's not just patriotism. Our President spoke essential truths. Gods willing, we will answer with courage, and nobility, the challenges laid before us. Though I'm just as angry as my countrymen, though I'm just as saddened by our loss, I'm damned proud, to be American.

I spent the better part of today inside setting up my own workstation. It was a lot more fun than it may sound for two reasons. The 'casual' reason was that it was my first real look at Windows2000. I've been a die-hard '98 owner for many years, and even resisted upgrading to "SE" for several months until I could see for myself that it was an improvement. Windows2000 intrigued me, but it seemed and unnecessary upgrade for home use, so I satisfied myself for looking at the box in the software store every so often and thinking "what if". I was able to intuitively work through much of the install, and I felt a validity in my technical skills.

Primarily however, that setup gave me a sense of foundation and ownership in my new position. My father was the first person to try and explain to me what "ownership" in a profession can mean to someone who works on a line, or in an office. It took me quite some time to really understand that it's that sense of belonging and accomplishment that you can get from work you are well suited to. It goes hand and hand with pride, and it's a feeling that can carry you through days that might otherwise make you want to walk away in disgust. Ownership reminds you that you are greater than the sum of your parts.

I had a sense of this at my last tech support job. Until then it had been about a decade since I really felt it. I never mentioned to my father that I'd finally figured it out. Perhaps I was too self-absorbed in the discovery itself. I think I'll call my father and thank him. He deserves to be reminded what a great job he did...

I spent today working in the field with one of the other technicians. It was a very enlightening experience, and it went far to reassure me that this job was going to be one I can take pride in. We saw a respectable array of tasks, and my 'mentor' was interested in my opinions, and helpful in her advice. All told it was a good day, and I look forward to more like it.

I told myself I was going to make time to write again every day, but one major difference in this job over my last one in Dallas is that I have no time to really pursue personal interests during slow moments. This is not a bad thing. I like the challenge of being immersed in this new situation, but it makes the vow to myself more difficult. I know that I am able to write something everyday if I put my mind to it, but I think the "feeling" behind my resolution was to write something that helped me gain insight into myself. My success in that endeavor remains to be seen.

As you can see, my site has undergone some upheaval. I feel like a bit like a different person, therefore the alteration... There has been an ongoing shift in my life, that has recently changed again, though this time for the better. I started working again today. This has been an immense relief to me, since being unemployed was starting to become quite telling on my self esteem. I'm a Network Technician now, and I'm quite looking forward to learning all that my new position cares to teach me. Learning has always rated fairly highly in my opinion. My technical skills I can see will very easily be broadened considerably.

Concurrently, there is other evolution at work in the person that I am. I'm still trying to see the forest for the trees, but some of these trees are quite imposing, and they command the lion's share of my attention. It remains to be seen what the end product will be, but then, I have a lifetime to ponder my observations...